So I wake up this morning on a Saturday of all days at 3:30 A.M. with this post running through my head and my mind won’t shut off, so I feel as if I just need to get up and get it off of my mind.
Romans 7:15 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.
Confused? Is there a war going on in your head?
That has been the story of my life for decades. Doing things that I didn’t understand why I was doing them, and wanting not to do them, but did it anyhow.
The good old conflict of natures.
In Junior High and High School, I was lucky to have one or two friends and ended up dropping out as a Junior in High School. Before that, I was skipping so much school, it was ridiculous. School; was to say the least, a major disappointment. I envy those that thought High School was one of their best experiences. I wasn’t really being bullied, but always being talked about. You know.. “Oh him, he’s a Fag” constantly as I walked the halls.
From the ages of 15-20 I found figure skating and had an extended family of about 40 other figure skaters, which included most of their mom’s and a few dad’s mixed in there as well. I spent 5-7 hours a day training. Those were some of the best days of my life. Looking back, I should have stayed a while longer, but the anger was setting in and I was actually starting to get very afraid of the triple jumps that I was having to start training on. I didn’t want to break my neck after all. Continue reading